It is a 1000 piece puzzle that i am working on, actually three different puzzles.
All have the Daddy quality that i look so intently for.
But of those three, only one makes me giggle.
If i say something to the other two and preference it with a lol, they say something such as "oh you find that amusing?"
And i have to ask myself, are they too rigid, too uptight for this one?
Or am i too "relaxed" for them?
It is important to me to feel like "me" around them. I cannot "pretend" to be the way i think they may want me to be. It just doesn't sit right with me.
Now this is not to say that i cannot suppress thoughts. I do that often. I spend a tremendous amount of time listening, analyzing, putting the puzzle pieces together to form the big picture.
And often those pieces that do not fit, end up here.
And i consider "is this puzzle one i wish to continue working on" or is it one of those that is just not right, that no matter what, the pieces will never fit.
The puzzle needs to be challenging, it needs to push me, but there is also a need to smile while creating the picture, otherwise it is just too frustrating, and it becomes an unwelcome chore.
Ah but that is really what life is all about isn't it....